I'm not exactly sure what made Mary Kate and Ashley such hot commodities but I'm pretty sure raw talent has nothing to do with it. Sure, they were able to look adorable next to Dave Coulier and Bob Saget (but only truly ugly babies would have a hard time with that) and were able to say, "You got it dude," on cue but that's where the cuteness ends. Stephanie Judith Tanner (aka Jodie Sweetin) was robbed of all the child-star glory. This is probably what pushed her to a life of crystal meth. Let's face it, Jodie Sweetin has ten times the amount of talent in her ugly sweater (seen in exhibit A) than either of the Olsen Twins:

The other people who must have been affected by the Olsen Hollywood takeover were the true twin stars of the show - Blake and Dylan Tuomy-Wilhoit who played Uncle Jesse and Aunt Becky's boys Nicky and Alex.

They had long hair like Uncle Jesse and were prettier than Michelle, but once the cameras stopped rolling, what happened to these boys? I'll tell you what happened, they stopped acting and wanted to lead normal lives where people like me don't try to dig up dirt about them to expose to the rest of the world. Nicely played boys. So, I have no rehab stories (yet) - but would like to report that these two have aged way better than the Zach and Cody twins.

Breakdancing has made a steady comeback in the last few years thanks to So You Think You Can Dance, America's Best Dance Crew and the lunch room at my old high school (I am not even joking). The other day as I was getting ready for work, I flipped on the TV and SHAZAM! Breakin' 2 Electric Boogaloo was playing just in time for breakfast.

I forgot how much I loved this movie -the dancing, the over-dramatic acting, the terrible dialogue- it was great to see Ozone, Special K and Turbo again. But what happened to them? Are they still dancing? Did they help the Hip Hop Grannies get their start?

Sadly it seems as though Lucinda Dickey, Adolfo Quinones and Michael Chambers haven't done a whole lot in front of the cameras lately. Lucinda (who will always be Special K in my heart) appeared as a judge for the reality show "Master of Dance". Now, IMDB says that it ran for 6 episodes in 2008, however, I have no recollection of even hearing about this show. Apparently Joey Lawrence was also a judge - which could be why I blocked it out of my memory.

Adolfo Quinones, the smooth operator who won Kelly's heart in the Breakin' movies, hasn't been on screen (other than playing himself) since 1995's "Steel Frontier", but he's had success behind the scenes. After seeing his sweet moves, Madonna had Quinones (also known as Shabba-Doo) choreograph a couple of her tours. Most recently, he helped Jamie Kennedy with some choreography in his movie "Kickin It Old Skool".

Michael Chambers - who did the best breakdance routine with a broom EVER - has had some bit roles in movies like Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey, Naked Gun 33 1/3: The Final Insult and Dudley Do-Right. It saddens me to say he also played the Urkelbot for four episodes of Family Matters. Yes, he played the robot version of that geek Steve Urkel.

Now, if anyone who has any power over the universe is reading this right now, please do me a favor: we need a Breakin' reunion. If the powers that be can turn Dirty Dancing into a Broadway hit, they surely can make Breakin' 3 a made-for-TV movie.

So I just saw a picture of Ben Vereen accepting an award for his role in some show I've never seen, and it made me think back to one of my childhood favorites, Zoobilee Zoo. Thank goodness for the power of YouTube. I'd just like to throw it out there that I still remember all of the words to the theme song.

My dearest Chubby,

Thanks,
Liz

We found them for you after the jump!

Fergie Ferg is gonna be singing about her hump, her hump, her lovely baby bump soon. Page Six reports that Fergs and Josh Duhamel are going to be expecting their very own little black eyed pee wee. We say good for both of them! At least this isn't exactly a shotgun wedding since they were engaged before knowing about little baby Fergamel.

More disturbing than Fergie's crystal meth addiction, and possibly what pushed her to going that route, is this Kids Incorporated song they had a young Ferg sing to an incredibly creepy clown. At no point in this video is it made lucid why the clown is there or why she is singing Lionel Richie to him. STAY AWAY LITTLE FERGIE! The only thing scarier than a clown is a clown who plays with a yo-yo.

Thank goodness for Frizz Ease baby.

We got this desperate plea for help from Nini:

I used to watch Kate and Allie as a kid - I didn't really like it all that much, but I mainly watched it b/c it was on in between Mr. Belvediere (RIP) and Growing Pains (now that we've got each ooooother!) anyway, I kind of always had a girl crush on, I think her name was Emma - and she I think was Allie's daughter, or maybe it was Kate. Anyway she was the darker haired one. I thought she was SOOOO cool and SOOOO pretty. She also had amazing hair, and I used to love that she wore purple so much!

Nini

Well Neener (if I can call you that) I must admit, this was a tough one but I'm gonna be able to come through for you.

Ari Meyers played Emma on Kate and Allie and she was the bee's knees! In 1990 Ari left her role as Emma and got her learn on at Yale, graduating with honors and double-majoring in Philosophy and Theater Arts. The movie you were wondering about did star professional wrestlers, but it wasn't Hulk Hogan. It was called Think Big and it starred the Barbarian Brothers.

She's done a few more movies, television roles and voice-over work over the years. Also, it seems as though you are not alone in your love for Ms. Meyers. Someone has created quite the fan site paying homage to her. I find it pretty creepy, but who am I to judge?

xoxo
Chubbs

If you were a child of the 80's, there was probably a period in your life when you either wanted to be Punky Brewster, or you wanted to be her friend. I, for one, used to tie multi-colored bandanas around my knees and put whatever hair I had into pigtails. Soleil Moon Frye not only had the coolest name, she also had spunk and attitude. I believe it was called "Punky Power", which was later one of the animated exclamations of her alien bff Glomer (does anyone else remember that?).

Well, Punky grew up to be a mother and a super fox. Last I heard, Glomer was working for the INS.

Chubby Jones Lovah, Nibs, from Chicago, IL wanted to know what ever happened to Punky's best friend with the rolled headband, Cherie "Cherry" Johnson. Well, to begin with, her real name IS Cherie Johnson. Her uncle had created the character of Cherie to be named after her, but hadn't thought she would be the one getting the role. Cherie had stardom in her blood and went after the part of her self-titled character. After Punky came to a close four years later, Cherie took on roles in Family Matters and The Parkers, and has written and starred in a film entitled I Do...I Did. Little known factoid: She was elected as the National Cheer Representative to introduce Nancy Reagan to the "Just Say No to Drugs" movement!

Here is quite possibly the best "Say No to Drugs" music videos from the 80's - be on the lookout for Bobby and Whitney when she really knew "Crack is Wack".

Because Punky was so Superfly, this remastered Curtis Mayfield track goes out to everyone who is down with Punky Power
Curtis Mayfield
"Superfly" (mp3)
from "Future Shock"
(MusicCom)

Buy at iTunes Music Store

My very first eBay purchase (and what proved that I am no good at eBaying) was an old VHS copy of the classic romantic comedy Teen Witch. I wanted it so badly, I spent $45 "winning" it but somehow I had forgotten that it gets played every year for at least a week, which is really how often I need to view it. I'm not sure what made it so wonderful - was it the random musical numbers? The incredibly creepy brother with the high-pitched voice? The tiny creepy lady from the Poltergeist movies? The ginger-headed protagonist? Oh what a rich movie filled with too many wonderful things to put into words! If you need proof, it's in the puddin':

There was a short period of my life when I really did want to have the magical powers of Louise Miller. She was able to make a voodoo doll of her mean teacher and have him make a fool of himself in front of their entire classroom, who wouldn't want that? She became the most popular girl and had the dreamy Brad Powell fall for her. But what ever happened to all of the actors and actresses who were destined for stardom after this film ended?

Oh what a wonderful day it is today; a friend of mine sent me the link to will.i.am's Yes We Can video for Obama. It gave me chills - why? Because one of my favorite child stars, Tatyana M. Ali is in it!!

I still remember the days when I would hang out at my bff's place for Monday night television. We'd race home from school, pop some Chef Boyardee meat ravioli into the microwave, or if we were feeling racy we switched to the personal size pizzas. We sang, "Now this is the story all about how my life got flipped turned upside down..." and sat still to watch the latest of Will Smith's antics. Cousin Ashley was always my favorite of the Banks children. She was funky, she was fresh, she dated Tevin Campbell for one episode and had her first kiss. I remember Tatyana having somewhat of a budding recording career but then she dropped off the face of the earth. So imagine my surprise to see her in Barack's video all these years later. What has Ms. Ali been up to all these years?

Tatyana has appeared in both movies such as the indie dark comedy Jawbreaker and television roles, the most recent of which is The Young and the Restless. Soon she'll be seen in the films Nora's Hair Salon II (I didn't realize I had missed part one), Privileged, and Hotel California starring opposite Tyson Beckford (meow) and Simon Rex.

While I've got that video posted...can anyone tell me who everyone else is? I saw John Legend, Common, Barack's #1 fan Scarlett Johansson, will.i.am of course, Kareem Abdul Jabar, that chick with the spinoff from Grey's Anatomy, the guy who used to be on Six Feet Under, a Pussycat Doll, Aiesha Tyler, Maya Rudolph, I think Dave Matthews' violinist...but that's all I got. I know some of you Chubby Lovahs can help out.

One Chubby Jones Lovah has asked me to dig up the whereabouts of actress Christine Elise, who may be best known for her role as the crazy Emily Valentine on Beverly Hills 90210. Here she, Brenda, Donna and Kelly perform a song that will foreshadow her and Brandon's relationship:

Well Chubby Jones Lovah, you'll be happy to know that while none of Emily Valentine's episodes will ever be as good as the Donna Martin Graduates episode:

her acting days were far from over once her character left town.

Ms. Christine Elise McCarthy has had many recurring and guest-starring roles on everything from E.R. to Law & Order: Special Victims Unit. Soon you'll be able to see her in theaters when she comes straight to DVD (most likely) in the new film, Route 30 whose tagline is, "A Backwoods Comedy, Hon!" --I mean, sign me up for anything that has the word "Hon" having anything to do with it, but I'm gonna guess this isn't going to do too well at the box office.

It looks like one of our readers is wondering what ever happened to the kids who appeared on the 80's sitcom Mr. Belvedere. For those of you who need a little refresher, the show centered around the relationships of the Owens family with their British housekeeper, Mr. Belvedere.

The eldest child in the Owens household was Kevin, played by Rob Stone (and not Marilyn Manson as some people have spun through the rumor mill). Since the show he has been concentrating on documentary film making.

The daughter, Heather Owens, was played by Tracy Wells who appeared in a few obscure movies like Dragstrip GIrl and Ravendance: Mirror Mirror 2. Lately she's been doing voiceovers for both commercials and animated programs.

Brice Beckham played young Wesley T. Owens and age has done him some good! Who knew he'd grow up to be kinda good-looking (although his facial hair leaves a little to be desired)?

Image courtesy of http://www.geocities.com/mrbeaverfalls/

He currently is an executive producer and actor on the show, I Hate My 30's.

Fun Fact: Kelly, of "Shoes" fame, also appeared on this show.

Now, I'm sure this offer has expired but I might send a request in for a Mr. Belvedere Fun Kit (check out the awesome electric guitar version of the theme song in the background)

Tea and crumpets anyone?

There was a good portion of the 80's that I would run around exclaiming, "Ha! I slay me!" thanks to the cult classic television program, Alf. I loved Alf to the point of exhaustion. I collected his comic books, watched his animated series on NBC Saturday Morning Cartoons and, much to the chagrin of my entire family, repeated his one-liners over and over again.

While I missed the program after it left the air, I never really missed any of the other characters...until today. I was wondering what happened to the daughter on the show, Andrea Elson.

It appears as though Elson (Lynn Tanner on the show) found love on the set. She married one of the show's production assistants, Scott Hooper, who is now a TV producer and they have a daughter together.

To be honest, I didn't even remember what the son on the show, Benji Gregory, looked like (thank you Google image search).

However, I can't just talk about the daughter and leave the poor son out. Our boy Benji has left acting altogether and followed a military path instead. He joined the US Navy in 2003 until 2005 when he left due to medical reasons.

Coming soon...Doogie Howser M.D. minus Neil Patrick Harris.

My mom and I were talking this weekend and for some reason both of us had been thinking about the girl who played Vicki the robot on Small Wonder. I don't know where this sudden need to find her whereabouts came from but now I'm on a mission. It's not just Vicki, it's the castmates from Mr. Belvedere, Alf and countless other programs that have kept me up late at night pondering their places in life right at that moment.

I can't lie, Vicki creeped me out more than almost any character on TV ever has. She was a robot. No, she was a girl! No, she was a girl robot! She spoke in monotone and was forced to dress in drag. She was emotionless which came across as heavily medicated. Sure, I watched, but I wanted to turn from the screen every time she appeared. Still, the image of the girl robot in her white and red dress and blank expression is burned in my memory.

So, for those of you were wondering, Tiffany Brissette (better known as Vicki) appeared in a few more acting gigs before becoming a nurse in Boulder, Colorado. Sounds very tame compared to the kids from Different Strokes but it's nice to know she hasn't gone the route of many other child stars and is actually doing something to better the world.