Chubby Jones

Excuse my beauty but how did this news get past me? Ricky Martin is the father of twin boys all of a sudden. No word on the mother (she didn't bang), but she did have two healthy boys for the singer.

Yeah, I'm putting Kevin Federline in the "Bump Watcher" category, cuz big poppa is getting a rather large gut. There's no hate coming from me with this one, I can hardly resist the temptation to run to KFC for their new fried chicken wrap thing myself! But I'd like to put a bet on one of K-Fed's next career moves...it shouldn't shock you, you know it's coming.

Celebrity Fit Club. You heard it here first.

Oh this is just too good to be true. The Sun is speculating that Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz might be engaged AND pregnant. At a recent cd signing event for her new album, Out of My Head (Ya Ya), the better Simpson sister's ring finger was looking a bit more bedazzled.

We're really sorry to say this because we're sure of at least some backlash but...Pete Wentz is a sexy beast.
We don't care if you're not into the androgynous emo skater-punk look. There is something undeniably hot about him.

What in the HELL is in the Hollywood bottled water these days? Starlets are not only getting knocked up every other day, but it seems like many of them are having twins. Jennifer Lopez (née J. Lo) and hubby Marc Anthony (née that dude who used to be in Menudo) finally welcomed their two new celebuspawns into the earth. Was it just us, or were those babies taking their sweet time to come out of the womb and into the limelight? It seemed like Jennifer was pregnant for the last three years. Felicitationes to the new family!

Jessica Alba and manwhore fiance Cash Warren are also expecting twins. Perhaps this will now overshadow her role in the straight to DVD classic - Honey.

Rumor has it that Nelly Furtado is preggers again, maybe that's why we couldn't even recognize her at the Grammys. The glow normally associated with getting knocked up translated into her wearing too much bronzer.

Belle and Sebastian - Another Sunny Day (mp3)

Geri Halliwell ruins our weekend by dashing all of our hopes and dreams of paying lots of $$ to see the Spice Girls play another tour. The good news is, we'll always have Spice World to turn to during the dark times of spice drought.

Matmos - Steam and Sequins for Larry Levan (mp3)
Baby Walrus - Ghostish (mp3)

Incredible artist Jim Denevan creates short-lived masterpieces in the sand. He does everything freehand with a stick he finds on whatever beach he is combing. It is incredibly hard to believe he can be so exacting without the aid of any measuring tools. We're guessing he doesn't suffer from ADD.

No Kids - The Beaches All Closed (mp3)
Kid 606 - Fabulous Muscles (mp3)

Fergie Ferg is gonna be singing about her hump, her hump, her lovely baby bump soon. Page Six reports that Fergs and Josh Duhamel are going to be expecting their very own little black eyed pee wee. We say good for both of them! At least this isn't exactly a shotgun wedding since they were engaged before knowing about little baby Fergamel.

More disturbing than Fergie's crystal meth addiction, and possibly what pushed her to going that route, is this Kids Incorporated song they had a young Ferg sing to an incredibly creepy clown. At no point in this video is it made lucid why the clown is there or why she is singing Lionel Richie to him. STAY AWAY LITTLE FERGIE! The only thing scarier than a clown is a clown who plays with a yo-yo.

Thank goodness for Frizz Ease baby.