It's not that HBO's True Blood is that amazing of a show, it really isn't - but it's got just enough ridiculousness to make it unmissable. Also, let's face it, vampires are hot. Even when the vampires aren't hot, the humans are. Sookie's brother, Jason Stackhouse (Ryan Kwanten), gets naked every episode multiple times. The boy has a body that just won't quit. Sookie's best friend Tara (Rutina Wesley) could probably bounce quarters off of her behind. Even if you don't like vampires or hard bodies, you should be watching the show just to hear Bill say Sookie's name.

The rapport between Ricky Gervais and Elmo is undeniably awesome. I think Gervais was made for working with muppets.

Back when you could listen to Howard Stern for free - a group of mentally handicapped people were featured regularly and provided the theme song for Robin's news segment. I don't have the money to spend on satellite radio (thanks a lot Tribune) so I gave up on the King of All Media. Fast forward to present day and I am incredibly excited to learn of a new MTV show (never would have guessed I'd be saying that) that centers around this same incredible group of disabled people who report on the happenings of what's going on around them. Take one look at this clip and tell me you aren't psyched for this to hit the air. I can't choose my favorite of the group - it's a toss up between the woman and the kid who looks like a cross between Michael Cera and Andy Samberg.

Duran Duran’s John Taylor plays a rock star on TV tonight. Yeah, yeah, go ahead, make your jokes about how he’s stretching himself as an actor – he’s heard them before, and he can deal with your sarcasm. Because dude, he’s John Taylor, he co-founded one of game-changing bands of the 80s, they’re still making music today, and he has people who fight to catch his cold. He’s doing ok.

John will be showing up on Samantha Who as Tommy Wylder, a rock god who starts dating Sam. Sam can’t remember what it felt like to be a fangirl back in the day, but her friends can – and they act accordingly. Look for Melissa McCarthy’s Dena to completely lose her mind as she regresses to a 13-year-old girl.

But no matter what happens on screen, it’s probably not as weird as real life for John. For example, there’s the bit about the cold…

“A few years ago, when [Duran Duran] had our reunion tour, we did a live radio thing in Atlanta,” he says. “I had a horrible cold and was going through tissues like crazy. A few years later, I met a woman who told me that she was at the Atlanta Q&A, and she had stolen one of my used tissues because she wanted to catch my cold. I was quite proud of that, I felt like that was a good overzealous fan moment.”

Someone stole John Taylor’s snot. If that’s not devotion – albeit creepy, weird and frankly quite disturbing devotion – I don’t know what is.

Duran Duran will do that to people, especially people who came of age in the 80s. I’m no exception: I once drove from Chicago to Detroit and part of the way back just listening to the Duran Duran playlist on my iPod – about 5 and a half hours of music, no repeats. I’m no snot-stealer, but I do love that band, and my inner 13-year-old girl was hyperventilating and making the sort of high-pitched squealing noise that only dogs can hear when I got notice that John was doing interviews to promote his appearance on the show. If the squealing was evident, he didn’t let on – apparently John Taylor is used to people like me adoring him out of reflex (flex flex flex...)

That reputation, and his apparently easy-going attitude, means that he will occasionally get a call to show up on a film or TV set. He’s played his share of rock stars and musicians on TV and in movies, but he’s still learning the ropes. “I’ve just about figured out that if you know your lines well, you’ll have a better time,” he says with a laugh. “It took me years to realize that. Once you know the material, you can start to have fun.”

So while he’s happy to do the occasional acting gig when it comes up, John Taylor is sticking to music. Duran Duran will be going back into the studio soon, making more music that prompts crazed fans to steal snot. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

If you're a mash-up fan like myself (which apparently is so 2002 but no one told me) DJ Minty Fresh Beats has put together an interesting mix of Radiohead versus Jay-Z. There are plenty of music fans out there who hate the resulting mix but to those people I say, IT IS FREE YOU DON'T HAVE TO DOWNLOAD IT. For the rest of you who would like to check it out and see for yourself, you can do so at Jaydiohead dot com.

Holy wha wha wha! Chris Brown takes home the award. He should give the award back to Steven Tyler for wearing those women's pants on stage.

Alicia Keys is closing out our night with her song "Superwoman". Let's do this Linda! She said there would be some surprise singers joining her which is exciting as long as Jessica Simpson isn't a part of it.

YES! Queen Latifah - they forgot to turn her mic on but she is still bringing back the U-N-I-T-Y! Kathleen Battle is opera singing her way onto the stage and bringing the house down!

Nicely done ladies. Time for this girl to go nigh nigh and have dreams of David Hasselhoff singing "More Than a Feelin'".

Not too long ago Chris Brown knocked my sox off with his dancing and singing routine but right now my boy-crush is Ne-Yo.

Favorite Hip-Hop or Rap Album goes to...Ew, they had Nickelback host that? Do people like Nickelback?

Kanye won, surprise surprise. Where's that inner filter that tells you when you should just say thank you and walk away?

Leona Lewis sounds good live but I have to say, as the years have gone on, the amount of nasally voices has gone up. It's like whenever anyone has to sing a high note they automatically go nasal.

This is much much worse than I anticipated. Sure, it's fun in an ironic way to talk about liking the New Kids, but that's where things should end. They're too old to be grabbing their crotches onstage. Joey Joe's voice hasn't held up as well as his looks but Jordan Knight can really hit those high notes.

Ok, their medley is finished with and we get our first shot of Queen Latifah in the audience next to 5-time nominee Alicia Keys. I am looking forward to Alicia's performances almost as much as I'm excited about the Indian leftovers I'm about to eat.

Favorite Female Artist Goes To...

Rihanna! YAY! She almost had a wardrobe malfunction. She's one of my very favorite people in the entertainment industry right now. She just seems like such a sweetheart, and I really want her to have babies with Chris Brown in another ten years.

The only thing I am upset with Rihanna about is her newest video with Justin Timberlake. I don't get it, it's painful to watch.

Christina Aguilera opened up with a medley of seven of her songs and girlfriend hasn't lost it. Motherhood has done her body good, but did you notice she wasn't wearing her wedding ring? Is that weird or do I just look into things too much?

Jimmy Kimmel seems a bit nervous and for some reason he is only picking on the Disney kids. It seems like crickets might be the next musical act.

Some really great looks on the red carpet tonight! Pink, Ne-Yo and (reluctantly) Miley Cyrus looks good on her 16th birthday. The New Kids on the Block are obviously not even close to being kids anymore but they look great. Even Danny Woods looks good! Nicole Scherzinger and the New Kids on the Block should just go get a room already!

Colbie Caillat's dress is made completely out of real flowers. Let's just hope it doesn't wilt mid-show. She and Leona Lewis kind of look similar.

I love Chris Brown but his fashion sense needs a little help. I mean, is he wearing Blue Blockers? He's too young to know what Blue Blockers are.

THIS is our American Idol? He doesn't sound very good. Where's an awkward transition to David Archuletta when you need one?

Alright it looks like we've got an older guy from The Bachelor, some lady from Dancing with the Stars, Nicole lead-singer-of-the-Pussycat-Dolls and Corbin Bleu interviewing people on the red carpet tonight. Former Project Runway winner designed all of the Pussycat Doll's dresses and is killing the words "Fierce" and "Fabulous" all on his own.

Christina Aguilera doesn't look too bad. The Jonas Brothers look exactly the same as every other time I've ever seen them. They're way too young to be dressing so old. Are we sure they're brothers? They don't really look all that similar.

We're going to be watching 19 performances tonight. I think this means I'll be watching for the next two days. I might take a break when Miley Cyrus performs. Oooh Sarah McLachlan, I didn't know she was performing, that's kind of exciting.

Jamie Foxx apparently worked with Carrie Ann on In Living Color and is pimping out his new album coming out soon. Am I the only one who really isn't digging Jamie Foxx the singer? Awkward transition between Jamie Foxx to American Idol runner-up David Archuletta. Ouch. Meanwhile David looks kind of dreamy! Obviously I'm in need of booze.

I'll be live-blogging the American Music Awards tonight, starting at 7/6 central with the pre-show. I've got an entire cabinet filled with booze to get me through the night just in case it turns out like the Emmys but I'm really hoping it doesn't come to that. The good news is we've got performances from Christina Aguilera, Rihanna, Pink, New Kids on the Block and a bunch of others who I don't care as much about.

If you're watching and have anything you'd like to talk about, hit me up on AIM at: whoischubby

Wow, I might still be drunk from last night because I am forcing myself to watch this David Hasselhoff cover of "Hooked on a Feeling". I don't understand the concept for this video - there seems to be a mix of African dance and Alaskan glaciers mixed with some flying nun. This is for sure making it into my "Best of the Worst Music Videos" playlist!

Old woman + Cat + Meow Mix Commercial lip synching = pure joy

This woman's smile could melt a pound of butter for the homemade cookies she'd probably make you.

The icy cold heart that usually resides in the dark crevice of my sternum is warm and fuzzy this morning. I was lucky enough to take part in the Obama rally held at Grant Park in downtown Chicago last night and share in a truly historic moment with thousands of strangers around me. Truth be told, I thought the process would take a little longer but it ended up being (thankfully) anti-climactic. Being the short, round girl that I am - I had to rely on the taller people around me to tell me why we were all cheering once something new flashed on the screens around us.

When the announcement came that Obama won, I think everyone was in shock. Everyone was calmly cheering - I was expecting more hugging and tears of joy. Now that I think of it though, we weren't able to bring in alcohol and they weren't selling any so I know that I, for one, was less likely to throw my arms around a stranger.

I've got to hand it to McCain, his concession speech was classy. Nothing prepared me for how patriotic I would feel while listening to Obama give his acceptance speech though. I'm probably the least political person in my family and while I pay attention to what's going on - I wouldn't say I get overly excited about listening to debates or checking CNN for the latest coverage. Last night though, listening to Obama, I was inspired and hopeful for our country.

Don't worry this won't turn into a political blog. I'm still more interested in Lindsay Lohan's breakfast than I am in day-to-day politics. I just couldn't let the day pass without sharing my hope and belief that today we are a new country and it's a wonderful feeling.

Ok, so when I was maybe five years old I had a gigantic crush on Mr. T. There were many reasons to find him so attractive - the mohawk, the bling, the overalls, the way he said "I pity the fool"....oh I could just go on. I totally thought I was going to marry him and had planned out the ceremony as such:

We would walk down the aisle (me probably in overalls and my pink "Thriller" shirt underneath and him in a black tuxedo), go through the regular vows and instead of doing the whole "you may kiss the bride" deal - he would rip his velcro tuxedo off as if his clothes were the same as a Barbie doll's and pick me up to whisk me away to the dance floor. These were my aspirations as a young girl - now you can see where I was mentally.

Not too much has changed since those good old days. In fact, after seeing this old video of him rapping - I might try to track down his number.

I think we can all agree that Megan Fox is one of the most beautiful people on this planet. I'd go as far as saying she has knocked Angelina Jolie off of the "Celebrity Women Would Go Gay For" pedestal and taken the top spot. Turns out, she might be up for it too!

The Transformers star was interviewed by GQ Magazine for their October issue (super hot cover btw) and opens up about a relationship she had with a Russian stripper. I like that; go big or go home, that's what I always say. While their relationship only lasted a matter of weeks and she has been dating Brian Austin Green for years now, Fox doesn't ignore the possibility that it could happen again. In fact, she says, "I could see myself in a relationship with a girl-Olivia Wilde is so sexy she makes me want to strangle a mountain ox with my bare hands." From where I'm sitting that sounds pretty major; I've never felt the urge to strangle a mountain ox.

Oddly enough, I think it might be because Olivia and Megan kind of look alike. Not a bad way to go gay if you ask me.