The 80's were the best of times and the worst of times for music. For some reason, it seemed, everyone and their mother was encouraged to make their own record. My beloved Chicago Bears pro bowl winning football team was no exception. Sure, at the time I rapped and danced to "The Superbowl Shuffle", but I was also 6 years old, had a bowl cut and wanted to eat nothing but Fruit Roll-Ups for every meal. These days, the shuffle is good because it's so bad. If you want to see other horrendously terrible NFL raps, head over to Holy Taco to experience all the Zubas you can handle on some old Miami Dolphins.

After the the Bears shuffling crew made us do the hustle, advertising teams got a little more lazy. "Hey," they thought, "let's do our OWN shuffle song!" Ad campaigns should be short, sweet and scantily clad - not 4 minutes long. Unfortunately, no one explained this to the Southern Food Broker Corporation. Here they try to sell us their services - as rapped by some middle-aged white guys who sound like they're chewing their gums and the pretty office ladies (one whose name sounds like my favorite Thai dish, Pad See Eiw - listen for it).