Carmen Elektra is getting married again and she's not straying from her tendency to marry men who like to wear makeup. You may remember she was briefly married to basketball bad boy Dennis Rodman, and Jane's Addiction guitarist Dave Navarro; she is now engaged to guitarist Rob Patterson who apparently has an on-again off-again relationship with the band Korn. Let's start placing bets on how long this will last.

Tom Cruise will be making his way back to the couches at the Oprah Winfrey show. His last appearance was the famous (and ridiculous) couch--jumping Oprah-grabbing proclamation of his love for Katie Holmes. You have to wonder what exactly is going on in his mind. I do. Sometimes I lay awake at night, thinking back to the good old days when Tom wasn't crazy. Remember when his movies didn't suck? Remember when he didn't take too many pictures that resembled this:

Teen queen Miley Cyrus has been asked to pen her memoirs. This girl is 15 years old, what the HELL are her memoirs going to tell us? I mean, she probably just got her period for the first time a month ago, what does she have to write about? I think Jamie Lynne Spears has more to say in a memoir by now, and more time on her hands since she doesn't have much of a career. Where is her book deal?